Back to school

Last night I set my alarm clock for the first time in months.
Turns out, I didn't need it.  
Even the little guy was too excited to sleep (but that really has more to do with the new freedom of a big boy bed and less about school-day excitement!!).

This morning my children did not fight with me or with each other.  The clothes were laid out the night before. Lunch was made and  the backpack was loaded up with brand new school supplies and fancy new indoor shoes.
Ready?  Set?  Go!!!!

This year Ava is in grade 2 and Sydney will be doing half-days in Senior Kindergarten.  We are in a new school due to zoning changes, so we had some butterflies this morning.  All of us.  I just love the back-to-school excitement and nerves.  It really is my favourite time of year, as a teacher and as a parent.    We had no problems getting Ava settled with her friends and lined up with her new teacher and classmates.  She lined up (alphabetically!!) and marched into that school without a backwards glance.  Just like that.

It's old hat to me now, so I no longer expect to shed tears as I turn my kids over to their teachers for the year.  But today I felt a little melancholy.  And you know what?  It wasn't because Ava was going to school (that part was AWESOME!!).  I think part of me was a bit sad that next year I will be dropping off all 3 of my kids for full days (Jack will be in full-day kindergarten) and then I won't know what to do with myself. My full-time job for the past 7 years has been to mother these kids.  Next September, they won't need that full-time mothering in the same capacity any more.   That makes me sad and scared at the same time.

I'm going to have to return to the workforce pretty soon.  Last year I went back to supply teaching a few days a month, and I will continue to do that this year.  But being away from full-time teaching for this length of time has had a profound effect on my career.  I thought it would be easy to transition back, but that is not proving to be the case for many reasons.  I feel like I will be starting over.  And I am worried about how that will affect my family.

I know, I'm putting the cart before the horse here.  For now,  I will try my best to enjoy this last year of having munchkins  home with me. This is the final leg of this part of my parenting journey.   We celebrated today with doughnuts (and a double double!!).  We'll pick Ava up this afternoon and I can't wait to hear all about her day.  I'm looking forward to that part of this day and I feel truly lucky that I get to be part of that!